Fully man??

Whatif…I’m having trouble believing one of the most fundamental Christian principals known to the evangelical church culture? If someone (let’s say me) were to ask you which is more difficult to believe…that Jesus is fully God, or that He is fully human, what would your answer be? Think about that for a bit before you read on…

We’re studying a book called “Grace – the Power to Change” in our care group. It is proving to be a very powerful book. I’m reading it now for, I think, the fourth time, with the intention of teaching the concepts to the group. Something struck me this time through that I have been completely oblivious to in the previous reads.

The author presents his case chapter by chapter, each concept building on the foundation of the last. If you miss the foundational concepts, then it’s easy to veer off the track. He “backs up” the concepts with various scriptures, some of which he prints out (in King James) and some of which he just references.

My method of teaching is to print off these verses, and other verses that relate, some in context, some not, in versions a little easier to understand. I pass out the verses individually and we study them, and reference back to the book, which most have read before hand. Pretty basic teaching technique.

On week three the author said that I will never have a full understanding of the grace of God if I don’t believe that Jesus was fully human. NO PROBLEM. I’ve been taught that since I was two…fully God, fully human. Everyone knows that! I read it through the first time and didn’t even notice it, second time, third time…ya, ya, ya…, get on with the grace stuff. But this last time through, after pulling out all the verses and adding all the verses that say the same thing, praying that the Spirit would reveal the Truth, and then teaching it to the group…I was struck with this amazing revelation that I DO NOT fully believe this fundamental theology. It’s not that I think it is untrue, or that I don’t want to believe it, but that somewhere in my mind, way deep down, I still believe that Jesus had more access to the will and the power of God than I do, that he didn’t lay down ALL of his deity when he came to earth, but kept some of it to do miraculous things, and to know the will of God..., that he did not become in every way exactly like we are…that he was not FULLY man, because he had to have kept some God power. If he didn’t keep some God power, then how did he do all that stuff he did?? He said that he did nothing of his own accord…that it was his father working through him…that the father was in him and he in the father…and now us in him and him in us. It says EVERYWHERE in the Bible that we have full access to the Father…that we have the mind of Christ…that we have everything we need…that we do not lack any spiritual gift…that we’ve been given fullness in Christ…that we have access to miraculous power…that anyone who BELIEVES in him will do the things that he was doing, and even greater things. Because everything he ever did, he didn’t really do, because it was the Father doing it through him.

A few post back I wrote that TRUTH + FAITH = EXPERIENCE. The thing is…I know all of these things are true…they have to be…they are in the Word, but somehow, somewhere I don’t believe it. This really bugs me. I know that I can’t explain to you how huge this is to me…how pivotal…the ramifications of me not believing this. I know I don’t believe it ‘cause if I did, with everything in my being, I would be living the life of Christ. When was the last time you saw me speak to a storm and quiet it. When was the last time you saw me touch a blind man and have him see, speak to a cripple…love unconditionally, forgive completely, live sinlessly and selflessly, give of myself so completely that I don’t have time to eat, and my family thinks I’ve lost it. These are things I long to do, sort of…except I’m too selfish…and too faithless. Well…faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God…but how do you get rid of selfishness??

I know there are those who will tell me I expect too much…that we are only human after all…but that’s just the point…SO WAS JESUS only human, full of grace (the same grace I have) and truth. Do I believe this?? I’m scared to, to be perfectly honest.