figuring it out

Kudos to anyone who tries to write anything of value.

Very, very occasionally I consider writing a book. Hopefully to help collect my thoughts abit...get them down in some systematic fashion...an "if this, then....what?" type of book. But, oh my gosh, writing is soooooo time consuming. I've never been a journaler because once I start I can't stop...I end up with writers cramp in my hand, I fill pages and pages. Blogging is a bit better...A) it's on a keyboard, ergo less writers cramp. B) it's a thousand times easier to edit. C) You can save it unfinished and (hopefully) find it later when you have more time, but, oh my gosh, writing is sooooo time consuming. (Did I already say that?)

I'm too chicken to post anything that I'm still processing through, that I still don't quite have a handle on, anything unfinished, but it would probably be good if I did. Better to get feedback while you're still thinking it through than after you think you have it all figured out. Sometimes though, feedback is too confusing. I've often told God that I wish I had someone to learn from, to watch, to help me understand. He always says "You do...you have me, my Spirit, to take from what is mine and give it to you, to remind you of these things, to teach and instruct and correct" and I always say, "but I want someone tangible" and He always says "the help of man is worthless. Trust me, ask me, wait for me, follow me..." and I sigh and say "OK......" The thing is, He says such different things than anyone I know....

I keep praying that he would give me the Spirit of wisdom and revelation that I may know him better. That the eyes of my heart would be enlightened that I would know the hope to which he has called me, the glorious riches of his inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for when I believe.